146 lines
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From sentto-2242572-59585-1038249586-jm=jmason.org@returns.groups.yahoo.com Mon Nov 25 21:05:18 2002
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From: Joe McNally <joe@flaneur.org.uk>
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Date: Mon, 25 Nov 2002 18:36:09 +0000
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Subject: [zzzzteana] Daft crimes etc
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Reply-To: zzzzteana@yahoogroups.com
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http://www.irishnews.com/access/daily/current.asp?SID=421083
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Loo rolls of honour and the invisible man
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Paper Clips: A round-up of the weekly press
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By Steven McCaffery
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The powers-that-be tell us that crime does not pay. And they found an
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ally in the Ulster Herald this week, which carries a cautionary tale
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for anyone thinking of embarking on a criminal career. The
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Omagh-based paper's 'As the Man Says' column brings a story which
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originated in the Middle East.
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"A gent recently attempted to rob a bank in Tehran," the columnist reports.
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"He was unarmed and began seizing bank notes from customers' hands."
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It is then explained: "He had paid <20>625 to a local sorcerer and
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believed that he was invisible."
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In the Lurgan Mail there was also news of a dramatic robbery.
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"A Lurgan newsagent has told how thieves drilled their way through
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three walls to steal <20>10,000 worth of cigarettes recently in an
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attack which was well planned and professional," the paper reports.
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"The thieves broke through the back wall of a religious gifts shop
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next door to the newsagents and then drilled through the partition
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between the back hallway and the front shop.
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"Moving statues of religious icons out of the way, the gang then
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drilled into the back of the newsagent's cigarette stand removing the
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contents."
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The owner of the Paper Chase shop is pictured next to the gaping hole
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left in his store and is quoted as saying: "On Monday morning when my
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wife was opening, everything looked normal.
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"But when she opened the shutters she found herself looking into the
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shop next door."
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The paper reports that the shop was the target of "another well
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organised crime" 12 weeks ago when thieves escaped with a safe.
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The shop's owner says: "The closer it gets to Christmas the more
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people are going to be open to this."
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The issues of crime and punishment are tackled by a columnist in the
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Down Democrat.
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Writing in the Downpatrick-based newspaper John Coulter calls on the
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authorities to "birch the vandals" plaguing the local community.
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He is shocked at reports of the "wanton destruction by vandals" and
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issues a call for action.
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"The time has come to fight fire with fire," he writes, "before
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unemployed paramilitaries decide to impose vigilante rule and start
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using so-called kangaroo courts to dish out their own brand of
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sentences on those found 'guilty' of anti-social behaviour."
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As an alternative to such reckless violence, he recommends,
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controlled violence.
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"It was a sorry day that the Manx authorities banned the use of the
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birch as a weapon in dealing with unruly elements of the Isle of Man."
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Getting his defence in early, he immediately rounds on any woolly
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liberal who may oppose his plan.
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"In many Islamic countries, public flogging of convicted criminals is
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the order of the day.
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"You might laugh and say there is little chance of such measures
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being introduced in the United Kingdom or Ireland given that corporal
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punishment was abolished in the vast majority of northern schools in
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the late 1980s.
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"However, people seem to forget that Islam is the fastest growing
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faith on the British mainland and it's only a matter of time before
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it numerically passes Christianity."
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--
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Joe McNally :: Flaneur at Large :: http://www.flaneur.org.uk
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--
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"I am the centre which exists only because the geometry of the abyss
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demands it." - Fernando Pessoa
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--
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Currently playing: nothing.
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