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1.8 KiB
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1 line
1.8 KiB
Plaintext
Plot: Stallone is a 'specialist' (Oooh, so that's where they got the clever title from?) ex covert ops person who used to work with the frighteningly manic James Woods, until Woods decided it would be more fun to kill innocent people than to put up with Sly.<br /><br />After the obligatory flashback scene explaining all this (Which I've just saved you the chore of having to watch if you've got better things to, like read the back of a cereal box) Woods now associates with the guy who killed Sharon Stone's family (Not in real life, the movie. Keep up!) When Stallone and Stone ultimately pair up, as you may have guessed they do, the situation becomes a sort of tag-team vengeance affair.<br /><br />Am I making this sound boring? Sorry, but the story really is as uninteresting as all that. To pep things up, director Llosa (who henceforth shall be known by me as 'king of the over-sized B-movie', after directing this AND "Anaconda") spends more time than is strictly necessary on a gratuitous sex scene showing Stone (yay!) and Stallone (ugh!) naked, blows some things up and practically lets Woods do whatever he wants.<br /><br />The script is laughably bad, and Stallone's acting tries its hardest to match it. I swear the guy thought he was doing Shakespeare, inserting needless pauses into his lines and never wavering from an absurdly solemn tone (Business as usual then for his worst work, only worse) The user who likened this to "The Red Shoe Diaries" pretty much nailed it. Most of us are aware that Stallone has done porn before, so perhaps he was yearning for a return to his roots.<br /><br />It is pretty awful. No worse than the 'made for TV' stuff they crank out usually, but seemingly so just by virtue of who is in it. Even Woods having fun can't quite raise the audience to the level of doing the same. Only watch if you are EXTREMELY bored. |